Ahh the night, here we meet again. For many 11:35pm is no late night, alas for me it is well past my bed time and I am here, at my desk as I have been for so long, so lost and confused by the weird side of YouTube and staring way being the obsessive side of Pinterest. I fear that this type of late night carry-ons could cause me to become some scary student creature of the night. Now I know I am just being odd and ranting but that is what I do. And what I do best. Don’t get me wrong, I normally rant about positive life things like being kind to bus drivers who wait for 10 extra seconds while they watch you run up to the bus clutching at your belongings as you then have to find your “correct change only please” to place in the money box. However the only really negative thing that I ever seem to rant about is me. Yes. I really do love to have a go at myself, just as every self-depreciating 20 something does. And why not? Sure that is better than hating others or judging everyone as below you?
My self-depreciating ways started a long time ago. A very long time ago. So long ago in fact I can hardly remember the first time I felt good about being me. About being proud of who I am, of what I am and what I am not. But then on the flip side I can vividly recall all the times I wanted to give up being me and start again as a new version, a Claire 2.0 as it were. This I have tried and failed at many times. It wasn’t until 2009 when I heard a quote from a singer I was only just starting to listen to, Taylor Swift (#sorrynotsorry) was in an interview discussing how when people try to be anyone other than themselves how they would one day run out of people to be. The best person to be is you. And yes I know it’s self-motivational and sappy but fine. I don’t mind. It’s good to fill your life with little things, pictures of cats, Taylor Swift quotes that make you a better person.
If you don’t know whether something is making you a better person then take a step back and look at who you become when you are with or near that thing, be it a person or object, an item of food or news feed. Look at the person you are after exposure to that thing. What do you do? Do you change? Are you kinder? Are you smiling more? Is your work better? Or are you grumpy? Do you find you have a headache from frowning? Are you slightly aggressive?
My favourite quote from the past few days was found, as they always are, on Pinterest.
“No matter what happens in life, be good to people. Being good to people is a wonderful legacy to leave behind.” ― Taylor Swift
And to this day, I think I must agree, I have met many people, on trains, buses and planes, in hotels, libraries and academic institutes, and the ones you remember, the people you know you will hope you bump into years into the future are the ones who were always good to you. I try to live in a good way, I am tolerant of everyone, even people whose intolerance I find it hard to tolerate, I am patient, I am attentive and I always try to be good, I forgive but I can never forget. When we look back at our lives we can only say how good we’ve been by how good we were to others and in return you see how good people are by how good they are to you. I must remind myself that a good person is a good person to everyone not just the people they like. It’s easy to be good to the good and friendly people; it’s the everyday garden variety idiots and evil ones that take the practise.
Somehow this little entry to my very self-indulgent blog section has gone from me saying I’m going to rant about me being a bad and unworthy person to be discussing quotes of Taylor and encouraging people to be good. I can’t be all bad then. But no one is perfect and I’ll never let me forget it! The only way you can be perfect is to keep trying to be the very best person you can be. So let’s just sit back and watch me go along in the marathon that is living the good life.
Take care lovely night time people
Claire x
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